Just Keep Swimming

A Journey of Reflection

Just keep swimming - it's a mantra I've used for a long time, but lately have been questioning its meaning for me.

It was starting to feel too cute or superficial or even excessively cheerful… Pollyanna Do I really want to keep swimming all the time? Has it become a phrase that I conveniently fall back on because, well… I paint fish? I've been trying to get clearer on why this mantra of mine is or isn't resonating with me still, and I was recently challenged to make a list of 100 reasons why this is my message (or not) So, I got to it and was on a roll listing things like…never give up…follow your dreams…believe in the future… swim or sink… you've got this… and then I came up against a wall at thirteen… thirteen! My suspicions were starting to feel validated and I was ready to leave it at that…but then, my stick to it nature kicked in (ha!) and I started to dig deeper. Be fearless, you have the ability to overcome, trust in yourself, be open to all of the possibilities, you can and have done hard things… But one thought on my list brought back a flood of feelings. "Through the journey, the destination is found."

These words were on a card given to me long ago. They didn't resonate with me at first, but as I saw them repeatedly on our refrigerator door, their significance grew. We lived in a cottage built in the 1700's, which was once home to the farmhands who worked the land centuries ago. It was a house that David lived in long before we got married and some of his siblings before him. We got married there, in the beautiful stone bank barn next to the cottage, which was down the road from the main farm house and stables. We took care of the horses and tended the herb gardens. The woman who owned the land and still lived in the main house loved David and offered to sell us our little portion of the farm at a price we could afford.

We were thrilled!

We loved it there and the beautiful gardens we created and all the memories and possibilities it held. But the owner died and the estate sold the property to developers. Our last days there were full of sadness and broken dreams. I took my paints and wrote a message, large, across the smooth plaster walls. Through the journey, the destination is found. I only got to 54 on my list and that was enough. I realized, that no matter the words, just keep swimming holds deep meaning for me. It always has and still does.